I have received several emails recently addressing the topic 'guilt'. Do I feel guilty that I get to paint all day? Ya, sometimes. I feel guilty that Dan Barney could be married to someone who has dinner on the table and isn't distracted. I feel guilty that other people have jobs they don't love. I feel guilty because life at home could be a little bit quieter. I feel guilty that I'm not involved in politics. I can think of lots of reasons to feel guilty but...
when I get caught in that hole, I've learned to step back a take a critical look at the people around me. Are my kittens doing well? Am I paying enough attention to each of them? How is Dan Barney and what can I do to make his life better? How is the rest of my family and friends and my house and church job and business? Then the important part is making adjustments where needed.
Each season of my life requires different things from me so I remind myself to be flexible and be present.
I'm working on a video that addresses a little bit more on this topic. I worry about other women that tell me they are moms who want a career in art. It's hard work and it's a constant challenge to keep career in it's place. I've made the mistake before of convincing myself that I was special and this ambition that I have was a gift that will better mankind but really...that was just a way of easing the guilt. I'm also happy for anybody who chooses art as an occupation. It's gives life a depth that might have missed had I chosen something else.
So...do I feel guilty right now? Nope, just grateful.
5 comments:
I found this today... http://painting.about.com/od/inspiration/a/guilt.htm and thought of your post.
guilty? i think you pinned it perfectly when you said "grateful". you've made your life what it is. a beautiful one.
You lead a beautiful life. I agree with Pamo. You got it right with the gratitude.
Guilt blows. we need an anti-guilt campaign. "Just Say No..to Guilt" Remember how we were always taught "Anything is possible!" "Believe in Yourself!" "Chase after your dreams" "Follow Your Bliss" and then we grow up. And I worry about kids who are surrounded by adults who don't make growing up look like a cool thing to do.
So thanks for making adulthood look really good.
xo,
quel
Thank you so much for your comments...all very thought provoking.
I have more to say about it, especially about growing up being cool so...thanks.
Hey, Cass. I'm exhausted, but too sick to lay down and breathe at the same time, so here I am. Late. Surfing the web for hurricane info as my sister is in Texas. She'll get a lot of water, but should be fine.
I try to balance guilt with the atonement. Am I doing my best, was my heart in the right place? Am I being honest when I answer that last question? If yes, than we're all good. Learn what needs to be learned and move on.
If the guilt continues to pop up, that's a message. That tells me that an adjustment must be made. Make the change, move on.
Long term guilt is anti-productive and not what God wants for us anyway.
Being honest and pure hearted in the first place can alleviate much need for guilt. I try to live my life with that focus.
I'm glad you don't feel guilty. Your energies are better spent elsewhere :-).
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