Cassandra Barney

I took my crush to one of my favorite places this morning. It was hot and bright and smelled of flood and fire. It's almost unrecognizable now that they've taken the steel plant* down. In fact, the whole area is practically unrecognizable. Where there recently were fertile fields are now new roads, ready for new houses. I passed by all of the road closed signs and do not enters. I'm glad I dared because I found something rare, something untouched. The trail was laid last night. I didn't hesitate, I wanted to ride it, to make it mine. It was so smooth, so perfectly unblemished. I was filled with a bliss that I blush just writing about. I could feel my heart in my chest and tasted the salt on my mouth. I didn't do it again because it wouldn't be the same. Consequences? Yes, there were. To get back home I had to ride up a hill that seemed impossible. I knew the only way to do it was to put my head down and start riding without looking up. At the top I usually want to throw up, it's that bad and then it's still a bit up hill the rest of the way home, but when I get home and gently park my crush in the garage, I'm glad. Actually I'm more than glad. That hill is like all things that are hard to do, it made me stronger.

*At the BYU Museum of Art I saw a fantastic show this last week. It's called, Dismantling Geneva Steel. Christ Dunker photographed the liquidation and demolition of a Utah Valley landmark. This show reminded me of the power of art. Leaving the show I felt filled up, I learned about something and connected to it and I felt it. Growing up here, I was happy to hear that the plant was going to be dismantled because our air would be cleaner and I was sad for all of the people who worked there. Dunker's photograph's didn't make an impression on me because of the beautifully composed design elements...it was something else. They were sad. They were an ending. I felt that loss. Comments were posted throughout the exhibit by former employees, one read, "I never see a steel plant that my heart doesn't pound a little faster. A lot of people see smoke and pollutions....I don't. To me they're beautiful places.