Friday, January 11, 2013

Heart Strings

 I think I enjoyed the holidays more than ever before. Time with my family felt precious, like I didn't want a bit of it to slip past while I was doing chores that would come undone anyway.
I know what made me want to change my need for order and control in my my artistic, chaotic life, it was having a kitten return from being away and not wanting to miss a minute.

I really didn't think it was going to be so hard to have one of my little chicks fly the coup. She is an independent little thing and she wanted to go to boarding school when she was five. That was Madeline's fault. She also thought it would be fun to move in with my parents when she was three. She even packed a suitcase and waited on the porch for them one day. My sister Sari and my parents spoiled her terribly. 

Dropping her off at school was so sad and happy, that I cried a lot. Every ounce of me wants to pull her back but I know this is part of the deal. I love her so much that I have to let her go. 
It still aches a little, this many months later. I'm attached to these babies of mine with invisible veins that don't want to be stretched. 
I am so proud of her. She even got straight A's. Actually she got one A- and it was in her art class. That made us laugh and laugh. That's one of my favorite things about her, we laugh. 

I still have kittens to cuddle at home. I might end up following littlest kitten to college. That or I will drive Dan Barney crazy, I'll tuck him in, shop for his clothes and start making him breakfast. Maybe he can grow out his hair so I can comb it. Hmmm...


Katie O'Keefe said...

I recently found myself, suddenly, and a bit unexpectedly, an empty nester and expecting a grandchild. Treasure these moments, Cassandra. But know that, your kittens will always be your kittens. They will still need your mothering, in one way or another, all their lives. The grace of growing into that new role is something that I know you will handle deftly, but not without a few tears shed and many more sweet smiles shared.

Cassandra Barney said...

Thank you Katie. Nice to hear from you.


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