Tuesday, July 29, 2008

When I was a student, I painted big paintings. The process was so passionate, so sexy. I would get caught up the colors and smells, painting into the night. It felt so good. I smelled like paint. I'd have paint on my hands and arms and clothes and in my hair and on my furniture and...
Duh! In real life, where mommy has to run in and change the laundry, answer the phone, watch a trick on the monkey bars from the studio window then get a band aid, move the water from the grapes to the pumpkins, and all while painting, the sexybohemianartgirllifestyle is taken down a notch... for a reason.
It was so very, very exciting to let myself be seduced by all that paint. I didn't plan on it. I was in a docile mood, painting swans, feeling in control. I thought I would just paint the rabbit then lay down the brushes and go for a swim when, Bam! I knocked over my medium and it oozed all over the table. I didn't want to waste it, it's good stuff. So I started mixing up color to use it up on the background.
It only took a second before I was painting with brushes in both hands, madly mixing colors and feeling that wonderful, intoxicated bliss. One taste and I thought...hmmm shall I change my painting style so I can do this all the time? The music was loud, the studio was hot and I had paint on the back of my knees. With every drip of paint that ran down my arm I grinned. All of my senses were turned up all the way. Everything was clearer, brighter.

...and then I looked over at littlest kitten and saw that she had paint in her hair. She also had it on her arm. It was on my phone too. Middle kitten reminded me that she was hungry and I'd been painting for a long time. The studio was really messy. I accidentally had gotten paint from the hem of my dress onto the kitchen cupboard, and so...I sobered up. Sure, it felt good, but being a mom feels even better than that.
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6 comments:

batty said...

Holy cow! I can't believe how much of that you've done since seeing you yesterday! You are superwoman - with all your painting and mothering! You go girl!

By the way, absolutely gorgeous painting!

Carrie said...

I can not wait to experience parenthood! Especially if you think that it is even better than all the passion and joy you experienced painting. With all my anxiety and worries about it, I know that I was meant to parent and look forward to it with all my heart

I Am said...

I think being a parent is like panning for gold, it's monotonous, exhausting work but every now and then you get a sliver of gold.
How'd you learn to paint two handed? That's what I call efficient.
Yes the student days were great! I loved my studio space in Crandell house where the music was loud, paintings were large and the smell of oil paint and turpentine was hanging thickly in the air, the all night painting sessions and custodians who cleaned up my mess...ahhh the freedom.... although such freedom can only be fully appreciated when one is a prisoner of parenthood. That's one of the reasons why I love being a mother.
Nice painting!

pamo said...

amen. i feel more tame now that i'm a mom.

Venetian Blue said...

How good it must have been to be a student at art college as you can really get involved in painting and not have to think about other stuff. I am an art student at the moment , however, I am doing this while I am a mother, wife etc and this is hard when you want to get totally involved in a painting but you get drawn to do other things - good things with my daughter, but lose concentration with the artwork. It is hard trying to do both but I guess I should think that I am really lucky in that I am following my dream instead of being stuck at an office desk all day!
Jacqui
http://www.jacquidodds.blogspot.com

JaninaCakes said...

...from your lips... So true and sad to have to wake up from our drunken states of creative bliss. -People keep telling me your family is worth it. Uh...I'm sure they are. j/k. They are.

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